48 saal ke baad bacha

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**********************************************************
Santa Ne Apne Sath Wale Padosi
Se Ek Din Puchha
Santa: “Ek Baat Bata Yaar, Kya
48 Saal Ke Baad Aurat Ko
Bachha Ho Sakta Hai? ”
.
Padosi: “Nahi Yaar Ye To Bahut
Hi Mushkil Hai”
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Santa: “To Yaar Apni Biwi Ko
Samjha Na, Ese Hi Faltu Mein
Condom Ka Kharcha Karvati
Hai

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Friendship Adult Version:

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******************************************************************
Friendship Adult Version:

Friendship is not About
'I'm sorry'
Its About
'LUND SE'

Its not about
'Where are you?'
Its about
'KAHA GAND MARA RAHA HAI'

Its not about
'No'
Its about
'GHANTA'

Its not about
'TOO SMALL'
Its about
'JHAANT BARABAR'

Its not about
'TOO BIG'
Its about
'GAND PHAADU!'

Its not about
'DIFFICULTY'!
Its about
'GAND FAT GAI'

And

Its not about
'WE WILL ROCK!'
Its about
'MAA CHOD DENGE'
Fwd to all your loving gaandu groups
Bachpan se 2 hi cheezein sabse zyada mili hai...
Biscuits aur dost!
Farq sirf itna hai ki biscuits Marie k mile
aur dost. . . . .Chut-marie ke..!.

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******************************************************************

Dinesh tere pas 6 Lollipop hai.

**************************************************************
**************************************************************
Girl : aaj aisa sex karo ki mere chillane ki aawaj door tak sunai de. 
Fir kya tha, pappu ne condom par lal mirch laga di, 
.M.D.H. ka tadka, 
Ang Ang fadka.
**************************************************************
**************************************************************
Maths Teacher -

Dinesh tere pas 6 Lollipop hai..

2 Neha ne chus liy,
3 Pooja ne,
1 Priya ne..

Toh tere pas kitne bacha..

Dinesh: "Lawda bacha! Wo AAP chooslo....

ː̗=))ː̖. \:D/ ː̗=Dː̖/ =))Ħªª
/♥\ ♥ /<3__, =))Ħªª
_||_ _/ \_ _| =))Ħªª
**************************************************************
**************************************************************

MASTER KEY

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******************************************************************
Ladki apne Boyfrnd se -
Mene 4 Boys se Sex kiya, to me Randi... Aur tumne 10 Ladkiyo ko kiya, to tum Jawan Mard...
Aisa kyo....?? B0L0....

Boy - Suno...

Jo 'Taala' bahut Chabiyo se khule,
wo kharab "Taala"

...Lekin,

Jis "Chabi" se bahut sare Taale khule,
wo

"MASTER KEY" kahlati hai...
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*****************************************************************

NAME :- CHUTINDER SINGH BOOBIYA

*****************************************************
*****************************************************
That joyful moment when you are watching porn with your girlfriend
 and
 suddenly she says I can do better than them......:O :p =D =D (y)
*****************************************************
*****************************************************
Banta to a girl: What's your name?
Girl: Carmen.
Banta: Yeh kaisa naam hai?
Girl: Becoz I like Cars and men. 
       What's your name?

Banta: CHUTINDER SINGH BOOBIYA
*****************************************************
*****************************************************

Mirza ghalib's suhaag raat's sher

********************************************************
********************************************************
Mirza ghalib ne suhaag raat ko wife ka ghaagra utha kar ek sher arz kiya:

"Le aayi phir kismat hame kaha pe,

Ye to wahi jagah hai, nikle the galib jahan se... :D =)) =D
********************************************************
********************************************************

Top Ten Rejected Valentine’s Day Cards

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*********************************************************************

Top Ten Rejected Valentine’s Day Cards
10. I admire your strength, I admire your spunk
But the thing I like best, is getting you drunk

9. Our love will never become cold and hollow
Unless, one day, you refuse to swallow.

8. I bought this Valentine’s card at the sto.
In hopes that later, you’d be my ho.

7. This feels so good, it feels so right
I just wish it wasn’t $250 a night.

6. You’re a woman of style, you’re a woman of class
Especially when I’m spanking, your big-round-fat ass.

5. Before I met you, my heart was so famished
But now I’m fulfilled. . . SO MAKE ME A SAMICH!!!

4. Through all the things that came to pass
Our love has grown. . . but so has your ass.

3. You’re a honey. . . and you’re a cutie
I just wished you had J-Lo’s "booty".

2. I don’t wanna be sappy or silly or corny
So, right to the point, let’s do it, I’m horny!

1. If you think that hickey looks like a blister
You should check out the one that I gave to your sister!

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*********************************************************************

Most Sexual Facts

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*******************************************************************

I wonder how many babies have
been born because of the phrase

"Trust Me"? :O =)):O =)):O =)):O =)):O =)):O =)):O =)) 

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*******************************************************************

Sex teacher: Insan ke SPERM ki 1 boond, 
                   khoon ki 100 bundo k barabar hoti hai'

STUDNT:Toh fir Sir, Aap humara khoon kyu chuste ho,
Direct lauda chus liya karo. =)) =)) 

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*******************************************************************
Mentos idea.....
Agar koi ladki aapko
Bhai kehde to turant.......
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.Usse thappad marna or
Kehna yaha kya kar rhi
Hai ghar chal...........:D=))

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*******************************************************************

Santa: kal pehli vari Teri bhabi di yad bhulawan wastay SHARAB di botal da Sahara litta.

Dost: Fer ki Hoya?

Santa: Hona ki si ? Lulli phas gayi Botal vich.X_X =D =))

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Women are the best vehicles in the world because:-
---2 beautiful headlights in the front
---2 great bumpers at the back
---Self -lubricating when hot
---Finger touch ignition
---Automatic engine oil change every month
---Any type of piston fits.
---Multiple seating styles & adjustments
----Great accessories
---Highest mileage 9months with just 5ml refill
---That's why MEN are dying to own one :please send to the other luxurious cars u know. X_X
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*******************************************************************

SANDAS par pesh he GAZAL

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***************************************************************
SANDAS par pesh he GAZAL

Aaj dast kya lage,
hum behal ho gaye,
Hag hag k kule hamare laal ho gaye.

In ghutno me ab to dard ho gaya,
Seat pe bethna bhi dushwar ho gaya.

Pet me na jane kya gud gud hota he, Ab to har pal jane ka mood hota he.

Dho dho k hamari jaan nikal gayi, 1 pichkari abhi mari thi, Dekho dusri phir aa gayi.

Puchur Puchuk Sarrar na jaane kaisi aawaze aati he, Padosan kehti hai dhire karo, Choti baby darr jaati he.

Apni bebasi ko dhund raha hu iss gazal me,Arrey koyi motor chala do,Pani nhi aa raha he nal me.
***************************************************************
***************************************************************

It's not Joke !! GROW UP GIRLS...

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************************************************************
Read This....Specially Girls and please take this seriously and on a positive way..

It's not Joke !!


GROW UP GIRLS...

He won’t use condoms,
U use pills… 
why?
Because he wants it natural?
(think of ovarian cancer and infertility )

GROW UP
He gets u pregnant,
U have aborted like 5 times….
why?
Because he is not ready!

GROW UP
He is tired of natural place for copulation
He moves to ur a#s Saying its tighter
Then u begin to l#ak n smell….
why?
Because u want to please and not loose
him...

GROW UP
You have been wearing his engagement ring for close to 4 yrs,
He is not wearing any ...
why?
Because he has promised u marriage.

GROW UP
He wants a Blow job,
Yet he won’t give u head…..
why?
Cos he feels u are not so clean “there”

GROW UP
You dress half naked thinking u look sexy n Hot,
He isn’t complaining But he has more cloths on..
Don’t be surprised when he takes a more decent girl home...

GROW UP LADY..
a guy dumps u,
u wana pay him back and all u could do
is to sleep with his friend and u think this
is pay back?
Like seriously? ??

GIRLS GROW UP..
U think getting pregnant for him will make him marry u?

GROW UP GIRL..
U become a single mama with No
Job, No means for feeding for your Baby
and yourself
so... U leave junior with Grandma n U go
back to the Hustling field "Then u begin to say....M­­EN Are Wicked!!!

Whose fault?
Please ladies be wise!
U know u deserve better than this... Don't always be at the loosing end!!!

Share if you feel its worth reading or else please ignore.
************************************************************
************************************************************

Call girl ne Arz kiya.

***************************************************************
***************************************************************
Call girl ne Arz kiya.
" Dheere- Dheere karo Sanam, Mandi ka Zamana he, Is Chhoti Si JAGAH Se, Zindgi Bhar Kamana hai...
,,, (",))
(';')__//\\
_/_/<<))-((

Pehli Baar chudai Karane K Baad Ladki LUND ko choom k Boli: 
Aaj Mujhe Satya Ka Gyan Ho Gaya,
'COKE' 'PEPSI'
Sab Bakwas
"MARD Ki LASSI"
Hi Bujhaye Asli Pyaas.

Suhagrat me puri koshish k bawjud Lund ghusa nahi
SARDAR:Tuje pehle kisine nahi KIYA?
SARDARNI:Teri Bhn ki chut,
bhosdike Jisne b KIYA
Meri chaddi utaar k KIYA.

Sex k dauran amir Girl apne Garib premi se: Tumhra itna bada kaise? Premi emotional hote hue: Garibi k karan bachpan me mere pas aur koi khilona nhi tha....

PATI Suhagraat Pe PATNI K Nipple Chuste Huve:

Tumhare Nipples Kitne Narm Garm or Sharbati hai"

PATNI (sharmate huye) :
Pata nahi ji
Jitne Muh
Utni Baatein"...

Sindhi's Son: Papa mere dur ki nazar kharab ho gayi hai, naye SPECS banwa do !
Sindhi : bahar chal, woh kya hai aasman mai?
Sindhi's son: Papa woh chand hai.
Sindhi: Isse dur kya bhenchod pariyo ki gaand dekhega???

Koyal samza jinhe,
Bhosdike wo kauwe nikle,
Dosti ke naam pe madarchod bhadwe nikle,
Jo roka karte the hame chodne se,
Bhenchod unki hi jeb se
condom nikle...
***************************************************************
***************************************************************

X And XXX

*******************************************************
*******************************************************
Biggest Maths Mystery:
.
Thousands of years passed,
Millions of theorems derived,
Crores of formulae made,
But still... 
.
X is UNKNOWN
&
XXX is WELLKNOWN
*******************************************************
*******************************************************

URINE Test

************************************************************************************************************************************************
Santa ek bottle leke chemist ke shop pe gaya
 aur usme se ek chammach chemist ko pila ke
 pucha: Meetha hai kya? .,....
Chemist: Nahi toh, kyu'n kya hai yeh? .......
Santa: Bas yahi puchna tha. doctor ne kaha tha ki,
            chemist ke paas jakar URINE Test karwa kar pata karo,
            ki URINE meh sugar hai ke nahi.
************************************************************************

mummy ji khet dikha do

**********************************************************
**********************************************************
Ek aadmi sasural gaya,

Uski saas ne use 7 din tak Subah-sham palak ka saag khilaya...

8ve din pucha..

Beta,kya khaoge?

Aadmi bola:: mummyji khet dikha do,Khud hi char aaunga....=))
**********************************************************
**********************************************************

Khatarnaak gaaliya

**************************************************************
**************************************************************
Khatarnaak gaaliya :

1 : Bhenchod lund fek ke marunga tera sara khandan chud jayega bhosdi ke

2 : Teri bahan ke moot me puncher dhoondu sale

3 : puchta hai mummy log mujhe chutia chutia kyo kahte hai, iski maa boli beta teri shakal hi aisi hai

4 : Sale lund jaise muh wale

5 : shakal dekho iski, aisa lagta hai porn movie me lund choosne wala

6: Tu sale paida hua tha ya hagte time bahar nikal aaya.

7: shakal dekho sale ki, jaise barish ke gobar pe se tractor gujar gaya ho

8 : sale shakti kapoor tere ghar aaya tha ya teri maa uske ghar gai thi.

9 : Yaar tera muh hai ya gaand, jab dekho goo hi nikalta haiX_X =D =))
*************************************************************
*************************************************************

BEST SHAYARI BY A STUDENT

*****************************************************
*****************************************************
BEST SHAYARI BY A STUDENT
Na chemistry hoti na main student hota,
Na ye lab hoti na ye accident hota,

Abhi practical mein aayi nazar ek ladki,
Sundar thi naak us ki test tube jaisi,
Baton mein us ki glucose ki mithas thi,
Sanson mein ester ki khushboo bhi sath thi,
Aankhon se jhalakta tha kuchh is tarah ka pyaar,
Bin piye hi ho jata hai alcohol ka khumar,
Benzene sa hota tha uski presence ka ehsaas,
Andhere mein hota tha radium ka abhas,
Nazrein mili, reaction hua,
Kuchh is tarah love ka production hua,
Lagne lage us ke ghar ke chakkar aise,
Nucleus ke charon taraf electron hon jaise,
Us din hamare test ka confirmation hua,
Jab us ke daddy se hamara introduction hua,
Sun kar hamari baat wo aise uchhal pade,
Ignesium tube mein jaise sodium bhadak uthe,
Woh bole, hosh mein aao, pehchano apni auqat,
Iron mil nahin sakta kabhi gold ke saath,
Ye sun kar tuta hamare armanon bhara beakar,
Aur ham chup rahe benzaldehyde ka kadwa ghoont pee kar,
Ab us ki yadon ke siwa hamara kam chalta na tha,
Aur lab mein hamare dil ke siwa kuchh jalta na tha.

*****************************************************
*****************************************************

Chapter: 07 Topic:Toofani Jhatke.

*****************************************************
*****************************************************
Sex Ke Waqt Mard ki taqat Ka Andaza Hilte Hue 'HIPS' se Nahin,

Balki LADKI Ke Uchhalte hue "B0OBS" se hota hai.

Aur

Sex ki Shiddat ka andaza Mard ke ''ZOR'' se nahin,

Ladki ke ''SHOR'' se
hota hai.

From:
Sunny Leone ki kitab :
RANGEEN RATON KI SANGEEN YAADEIN
Chapter: 07
Topic:Toofani Jhatke.
*****************************************************
*****************************************************

Janhit me Jari..:D

************************************************************
************************************************************
Railway Station Warning Board:
.
.
.
.
. .
.
.
.
.
Rail Ki Patri Par Baith Kar Poop Na Karein. Aap Roz Haath Se Picchwada
Dhote Hain,
Kisi Din Picchwade Se Haath
Dho
Baithenge"
. Hahahahaa lolz0 :-D :-D Janhit me Jari..:D
***********************************************************
***********************************************************

baap ko love letter

****************************************************
****************************************************
During exams..

1 Dost Barabar likh raha hai..
.
.
2nd frnd continously
saying:''Kutte kuch bta de.. .
.
1st frnd Reply:"Mujhe khud ghanta kuch aata
hai...:/
.
. .
.
.
2nd frnd ultimate reply:"Toh kya apne baap ko
love letter likh raha hai.. ?? :p :D :O
***************************************************
***************************************************

saala Liver hi LOCAL nikla

**********************************************************
**********************************************************
Sharabi daaru pee pee kar mar gaya, lekin marte marte bhi keh gaya:"

.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Daaru toh BRANDED hi peeta tha,

.
.
.
saala Liver hi LOCAL nikla...:p :O :D
********************************************************
********************************************************

funny moment in student life

***********************************************
***********************************************
1 student ki life ka sabse funny pal
kab hota h??
..
Jab usko exam me kuch nahi aa
raha ho or piche teacher aake kahe,,,
..
.,
..
"beTaa copy chupa lo...pichhe wala dekh
raha hai!!".. :p xD
..
**********************************************
**********************************************

MERI SORRY KI SPELLING GALAT THI KYA.. ?

**********************************************************
**********************************************************
Ek Budha Ek ladki se Takraya....:O
.
.
Budha: "Sorry... :)
.
.
Ladki:"Andha hai kya... Dikhta nahi..
Ladki Jaise hi Aage
badhi,
Ek handsome ladka us ladki se
takra gaya...
.
.
Ladka:"Sorry... ;)
.
.
Ladki:"It's okay..:p
.
.
Budha ladki se bola
"MERI SORRY KI SPELLING GALAT THI
KYA.. ??":p:O :D
********************************************************
********************************************************

Share or shayeri Time

***************************************************
***************************************************
Best english shayri ever :-
"Later d bus longer d que..."
.
.
.
Gaur farmana...
.
.
Later d bus longer d que..
..
..
..
..
..
"Shorter d skirt awesm d view...":p :D ;)
THOKO LIKE IF AGREE..;)))
*******************************************************
*******************************************************

10 Lakh ki car me jaunga to rob padega..

************************************************************
************************************************************
Son 2 dad:"Car ki chabhi do college
me new year function hai..
.
.
.
.
Dad:"Car.. ??
.
.
Son:"10 Lakh ki car me jaunga to
rob padega..
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Dad:"Ye le 10rs.
48 Lakh ki bus me ja zyada rob
padega...:p :D :O :D
Daddy rocks
Beta shock...:p :D

**************************************************************
**************************************************************

MAHA KHATARNAK STUDENT

***************************************************
***************************************************
MAHA KHATARNAK STUDENT :D

Teacher: What is a verb?
Student: A verb is a valve
found in bicycle tyre.

Teacher: What are you saying?.
Student: It is a complete sentence.

Teacher: Are you mad?.
Student: It is a question.

Teacher: Don't be silly.
Student: It is an advice.

Teacher: Stop that nonsense.
Student: It is a command.

Teacher: You are an idiot.
Student: It is an insult!.

Teacher: Get out of my class.
Student: It is an order!

Teacher: Oh my God! What a shame!
Student: It is an exclamation.

Teacher: May God have mercy on you.
Student: It is a prayer sir! :P :D
***************************************************
***************************************************

ThumsUp is launching Viagra drink

*****************************************************
*****************************************************
ThumsUp is launching Viagra drink.

It is named....

"LUNDS-UP"!

ith punch line

"Fuck The Thunder, Dal de undar "..
******************************************************
******************************************************

To Kya Hum chodna Chhod De

**********************************************************
**********************************************************
Ek Ladke Ko Darr Tha Ki Vo Exam Mein Fail Na Ho Jaye To Raat Ko Chhat Pe Ek Taara Tootte Dekh Usne Pass Hone Ki Mannat Mangi

Piche Khade Uske Dad Ne Ye Suna To Usko Samjhate Hue Bole.

Papa: "Beta, Log Chand Par Pahuch Gaye, Aur Tum Toote Taaron Mein Apna Naseeb Dhund Rahe Ho?"

Beta: "Papa, Science Ne Test Tube Baby Banaya, To Kya Hum chodna Chhod De"
**********************************************************
**********************************************************

Duniya "MADARCHOD " Hai..

****************************************************************
****************************************************************
Masterji :- Baccho duniya gol hai..:) 

Student :- Aap kehte ho to, maan leta hoon........ warna papa to kehte hain.......

" Duniya "MADARCHOD " Hai..:O >=) =)) =D
***************************************************************
***************************************************************

Choot Ka ek baal...............

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****************************************************************
Ek boy ne apni girlfrnd se gift manga..

Girlfrid ne Choot Ka ek baal de dia..

Ladka wo baal Le kr sunaar k pas gya or kaha:Ye chaandi k box me saja k do.. 

sunaar ne 2 din ka time dia..

2 din baad jb Ladka Lene aya to sunaar ne pucha: Ye kisi Bde Sadhu-Sant ka baal hai..?

Ladka:Ye sant ka nhi meri girlFrnd ki Choot ka baal hai..

Sunaar:Behn ke Lodey pehle Q nhi btaya..
hum sb ghar walo ne 3-3 bar dho k piya hai..
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****************************************************************

hakim ki maa ki...

*****************************************************************
*****************************************************************
Santa ko piles ho gaya.
Hakim: Marham lagwane roj aana padega.

Hakim ne usko 4 din marham lagaya aur kaha: Ab kafi theek ho, baki biwi se lagva lena.

Agle din Preeto marham lagane lagi to usne ek haath Santa ke kandhe par rakha, aur dusre se marham lagane lagi to Santa ne pucha: Tera ek haath kandhe par hai dusra kaha hai?

Preeto: "Us se marham laga rahi hu.

Santa chonk kar bola: "hakim ki maa ki... , Uske to dono haath mere kandhe par hote the...:)
*****************************************************************
*****************************************************************

Make Up Your Mind

*****************************************************************
*****************************************************************
A Man Is Sitting Next To A Woman Who’s
Trying To Breast-Feed Her Baby In A Bus.
The Baby Refuses To Suckle the Breast &
The Mother Warns: “If You Don’t Suck, I
Shall Give It To The Uncle Next To Me”.
The Baby Still Refuses.
After About 20 Minutes, The Woman
Repeats The ‘Threat‘.
The Man Clears His Throat & Says: “Look,
Madam, You Better Make Up Your Mind . I Was Suppose To Get Off Six Bus-Stops Ago“
*****************************************************************
*****************************************************************

Niche Ungli kar k

*******************************************************
*******************************************************
Santa ne Padosan se Jhagda karte-karte, uski Panty me Ungli Daal di. 

Padosan: Teri ye Himmat? 

Santa: Tune hi to kaha tha Niche Ungli kar k Baat kar

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*****************************************************