We can write anything for good marks.

Question:" Why AMBULANCE is WHITE in color ?? (15 marks)
.
Ans:" AMBULANCE has OXYGEN cylinder,
.
Oxygen is a gas,
.
GAS is used 4 cooking FOOD,
.
FOOD is source of VITAMINS,
.
WE get Vit-D from SUN,
.
SUN produces LIGHT,
.
LIGHT comes from bulbs,
.
Small BULBS are used to decorate CHRISTMAS tree,
.
CHRISTMAS means GIFTS,
.
GIFTS are given by SANTA,
.
SANTA lives in NORTH POLE,
.
NORTH POLE is the house of POLAR BEARS,
.
POLAR BEARS are WHITE..
.
That's why ambulance is WHITE...
.
Do not play with
students feelings.
.
We can write anything for good marks..:p :O 

Chhakke ki aulaad..(6ke ki olad)...

Ek shaitan baccha unknown number se call karta hai..
.
.
ek aadmi uthata hai.. Aadmi:" Hello..

Baccha:" Ullo pullo kullo !!

Aadmi:" Kaun hai be ??

Baccha:" Ek Insan

Aadmi:" Wo pata hai naam bol??

Baccha:" Main ek ganda bacha hu !

Aadmi:" Teri to esi ki tesi Kahaan rehta hai tu ??

Baccha:" Prithvi pe..

Aadmi:" Wo to pata hai, phone kyu kiya ??

Baccha:" Tujhe pareshan karne ke liye

Aadmi:" Ruk saale..
apne baap ko bula! Chhakke ki aulaad..

Baccha:" Hello papa, main pappu... :p >:O :D

Log TALIYA Baja Rahe the

Machchhar Ka Bachcha Paheli Baar Uda..

.
Jab Wapis Aaya To Baap Ne Pucha,

.
.
Kaisa Laga ??

Machchhar:" Bahut Accha,

.
Jaha Bhi Gaya Log TALIYA Baja Rahe the... :p :O
Kis Kis Se tu Bhagegi Hun Bach Bach Ke

tenu Rab Ne Husn Dita Raj Raj Ke...♥ ;))


Ladki bigdi hui hai

Hindi grammar teacher :-
Wo ladki sbse has k baat
krti
hai
Batao isme Ladki kya
hai ?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Pappu :- Sir Ladki bigdi hui
hai
or setting
krna chahti hai. :P

Kavi ka beta School Me.

Kavi ka beta School Me..
Teacher:"what is Noun ??
.
Student:"Arz karta hoon,
.
Every Dog In Their Own Street Like as a kingWah wah...
.
.Every Dog In Their Own Street Like as a king
.
.
Noun is a Name Of any
person place or
thing... :p :O :D

kabhi paise liye hai

English na aane ka nuksaan
Boyfrnd apni girlfrnd se:" Darling Are u free tonight... ??
.
.
.
.
.
GF:" Haramkhor! Free ke bacche
       Aaj se pehle kabhi paise liye hai tujhse... ?? :p:O :/ :D

Sath Wale Toilet Se Meri

1 Admi Public Toilet Mein Betha
Tha Ki Achanak Sath Wale
Toilet
Se Awaz Aai:" Kya Haal Hai?? .
Admi Ghabra Kr:" Theek Hu,.
Phr Awaz Aai:" Kya Kar Rahe
Ho ?? .
Admi:" Bhai Jo Sab Yahan
Karte
Hain, .
Phir Awaz Aai:" Main Aa
Jaun ?? .
Admi Pareshan Ho Gya aur
Jaldi
Se Bola:" Nahi Nahi Main akela
hi thik Hu.. .
Phir Awaz Aai:
.
.
.
Acha Yaar Main Tumhen Baad
Mein Call Karta Hu..
Abhi Koi Ullu Ka Patha Sath
Wale Toilet Se Meri Har Baat Ka
Jawab De Raha Hai...:p :/ :O:D

hey baby, what r you doing.. ??

Boyfriend on call:" hey baby, what r you
doing.. ??
.
.
Girlfriend:" Sir dard kar raha hai jaanu sone
ja rahi hu, and you sweet heart.. ?? .
.
.
.
.
Boyfriend:" mai Cinema Hall me tere piche baitha popcorn kha raha hu
kamini...:p :O :D

JadejaFacts"

Sir Ravindra Jadeja can wear his shoes first and socks later.

When Mark Zukerberg created Facebook he already had a friend request waiting from Ravindra Jadeja #JadejaFacts"

Once the ball turned so much and the non striker got clean bowled."

Do you know why SUNDAY is a national Holiday World Wide?Coz it has RAVI in it. RAVIndra Jadeja's rest day.

Sir Jadeja was the Driver of the bus in which Rajinikanth worked as a conductor.

Sir Jadeja never appeals, he just orders the umpire to give the batsman out.

SIRJadeja once took a carbon ball, he rubbed it so much it turned into Kohinoor Diamond."

Sir Ravindra Jadeja once gave his blessings to a kid. That kid grew up to be Rajinikanth

Necessity is the mother of Invention . Jadeja is Father .

Ravindra Jadeja once bowled an 8-ball over with 8 different balls which are still spinning. We call them planets.

Sri Sri Ravindra jadeja once recruited a man.Now,He is known As ACP Pradhyuman.

India has never lost a Test Match when Sir Sri Sri Ravindra Jadeja is included in the playing XI. spread the message. JadejaFacts"

d opposite of

wats d opposite of "dominoz" ?
Think..
Tired?
"domi doesnt know"..
1 more!
Wats d opp of "pizza hut" ?
Tired agn?
"pizza hatna mat"
..
K another 1!
Wats d opp of "gopalakrishnan" ?
Keep thinkin..
its "come-palakrishnan"
stop bangin ur head! Last 1..
Wats d opp of "subramanium sawmi" ?
gave up?
Subramanium dint see me!;)
kk Last one promise..
Wats d opposite of jogeshwari ?
jogesh dont worry >=)

Soup Khatam Ho Gaya

Ek Baar Ki Baat Hai, Pappu Apni Girlfriend Ko
Ek Restaurant Main Lekar Gaya..
.
.
Uske Paas Paise Nahi The,
Wo Apni Jeb Main Ek Coackroach Le kar Gaya,
Aur Saara Khana Khane Ke Baad, Usne Soup Mangaya Aur Usme Cockroach Daal Diya,
.
.
Aur Jor jor Se Chillane Laga,”Ye Kya Laga Rakha Hai, Customer KoZeher Khilate Ho
”Manager Ne Request Ki, Please Shor Mat Machaiye Aur Saara Bil Maaf Ho Gaya..
.
.
.
Agle Din Usne Ye Story Apne Ek Friend Ko Sunayi,
Aur Uska Friend Bhi Uski GirlfriendKo Lekar Usi Restaurant Main Gaya, Aur Jab Usne pooraKhana khaneKe Baad Soup Order Kiya,
.
.
.
.
To Reply Mila Ki Soup Khatam Ho Gaya hai... :):P :O :'(
.

HARAMZADA

BF-Tum Mujhe kitna
pyar karti ho
.
.
.
.
GF- Arz Maarti hu ...
Chaha Hai jise chahat se zyada
Samja Hai jise khud se zyada
Bharosa Hai jispe sabse zyada
Tu hi Hai woh"HARAMZADA" :p :

MObile Ki Battery 6 - 6 Din

Jis Din Se ussne mujhe
Chod Dia
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
MObile Ki Battery 6 - 6 Din
Chal Jati hai...:):-P

Hay touba chilla q rhe hain

Dulha Dulhan se:-
tmhare Shadi se pehle kitne boyfrnd the?
Dulhan silent!
Dulha chilla ke: Mai is khamoshi ko kya samjhu?
Dulhan: Hay touba chilla q rhe hain..gin toh rhihu. :D :p

Full Form of Hacker

Full Form of Hacker

H - Hide IP
A - Aim Victim
C - Crack Encrypt
K - Kill Firewall
E - Enter into Database
R - Return Anonymous

see the guts..!

Engineer and medical collage principals
argued dat their stdnts r fearless
.
Medical college principal called
the students and asked to jump in sea full of
sharks. .
.
They jumped.
.
Principal said: see the guts
. .
.
.Engg Principal called the students&told them to
jump

Students: R u mad?? go to hell..

Principal: see the guts..!! :D:D

One British girl.

Wife: I am going 2 LONDON. What gift do u want?

Husband: One British girl.

Wife returns Home.
...

Husband: Where is my gift?

.
.
.
..
Wife: Wait 9 months....

Hona chahiye wrna ******* wo bhi krte hn

" Larki Inteligent honi chahiye Warna Fair & Lovely to 5 rs me milta he "

" Admi honest hona chahiye warna Smart to phone bhi hote he "

" Insaan Dimaag wala hona chahiye Warna Kaam to Gadhe bhi bahot karte he "

" Admin Acha hona chahiye Warna Copy to bandar bhi kar lete he "

Great lins By Great men

Bush: Osama mile toh use fod do!!!
Gandhi: Hinsa achi baat nhi, use chod do!
Einstein: Samay rukta nhi, to use mod do!
Manmohan: ... ..........................

Sonia: desh k liye mujhe vote do. :P
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Biceps build karne k liye uspar load do!
Bill Gates: Windows unlock karne k liye use code do!
Rajnikanth: oye admin ! mere karname duniya k samne lana chodhh do


And d best 1
.
ACP Praduman: Daya, khooni andar hai main kehta hu darwaza tod do..;) :P

I am my own boss

I was in a taxi whn d taxi driver said:
I luv this job ...I am my own boss n nobody Tells me what to do.

Then I replied "Aage se left le." :D :p

Billi Ka Baap Bhi Nahi Chal Sakta“

Teacher Pappu Se: “Khali Jagah Poori Karo,

900 Chuhe Kha Kar Billi________ Chali”
.
.
Pappu: “900 Choohe Kha Kar Billi Slow-Slow Chali”
.
.
Teacher Gusse Se:"“Khade Ho Jao, Mazak Karte Ho ”
.
.
Pappu: “Miss Ye Bhi Maine Aapka Dil Rakhne Ke Liye
           Keh Diya Warna 900 Choohe Kha Kar Billi Ka Baap  

           Bhi Nahi Chal Sakta“.. :p :O :D

Sexy poem

Sexy poem 

- Mohini aao khelenge. 

- Nahi Aap humko pelenge.

- Yehi to pyar ki kasauti hai

- Nahi,Meri chut bahut chhoti hai

- Dekh Tere liye is dil me kitna pyar bhara hai

- Nahi Mujhe pata hai Aapka Bahut der se khada hai

- Dekh Ye tera husn aur nikhaar dega.

- Ji nahi Ye meri chut+gand dono phad dega..
      ....../ / /'''''\\
          / / / ⌣ ⌣|\

                \_/ .. /
  _' `-. / / /''''\\
       / \| / / _ _|\
        / \ / /) _' |\.
      ; | _/-')\ - /' \
| | | _.-' ` -'( |
` `\ •/ _, )/ \
`\ \ \ \-'. . . \
: \ | |\ \ | \ \ \
`. `\ \ / \ ;' •) •) \
| \. `"-._\ \`.__.'__.' \
| "-.__ \ \ / \ \
) / ,\_./' \ / \ \
.' | .' <//::\ \ `,__
/ #'| </ ||\ |/--\\\
| \#.-\ `' \
| )_.-`\ \
| |( `\ |
\ | | | \ \
\ | ' | \ \
\ | | \ \
BABA CHODUDAS KA UPDESH:
3 Cheeze Zindagi me ek Baar milti hai

(1) LUND

(2) PAHLI CHUDAI

(3) JAWANI

3 Cheeze Soch samaj Kar Uthao

(1) LAUDA

(2) HATHODA

(3) DARU SANG SODA

3 Cheeze Soch Ke Karo

(1) PADOSAN SE CHUDAI

(2) KHET ME KHUDAI

(3) DOST KI VIDAI

3 Cheeze Kisi Ka Intezar nahi Karti

(1) RANDI KI CHOOT

(2) BIGDA HUA POOT

(3) AATA HUA MOOT

3 Cheeze Choti Na Samjo
(1) SOYA LUND

(2) AATI THUND

(3) Mutual FUND

3 Cheeze hamesa Dard deti hai

(1) KUNWARI CHOOT

(2) DAKU KI LOOT

(3) ATKA HUA MOOT

3 Cheeze hamesa apko khush rakhegi

(1) CHODNE KI KHUMARI

(2) BHOJAN KI TAIYARI

(3) MERI YARI.
Men will be Men:

Nipple Mila. Chusna Shuru,
DEWAAR Mili. Mutna Shuru,
Zuban Fisli.. Maa-Behan Shuru,
Gaand Mili. Ungli shuru,
Fokat Ki Mili. Pina Shuru...
Lund haath aaya. Hilana shuru..
Char dost mile. Gandmasti shururu . Ladki mili.Chudai ki planning shuru...

Ultimate bezzatti

Ultimate bezzatti

Girl:" Jaanu So Jao Na Dekho Raat Ke 2 Baj
Rahe Hain.,
Pappu:" Neend Nahi Aa Rahi.,
.
.
Girl:" Jan Q Itna Sochty Ho Mere Bary Mein, Itna
Pyar Karty Ho Mujh Se..
Main Tumhari Hi To Hoon..
Pappu:"
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Oye chal ja apna kam kar Chudail..
Mujhe "PAPER" ki Tension Lagi padi hai or
tujhe apne Ishq ki...:p :O :D :/

If Cricketers were Students :-

If Cricketers were Students :-

Rahul Dravid - University Topper..

Sehwag - The student who does not study at all, but is able to score decent marks in exams

Ravindra Jadeja - A unique student who gained Bachelors/Masters and PHD in one semester itself. :P

Virat Kohli- Fights with his classmates for copying in exam hall and even abuses the professor who fails him in exam :P

Sachin Tendulkar - He's a professor, not a student in the university. but he is still interested in studying and improving his knowledge. he is a friendly professor.....99% of the students like him..

Nehra - Always help others in exams and get caught and get punished.

MS Dhoni - A student who passes time in 1st two hours and still FINISH the exam in last hour with A Grade. .

DANCE COMPETATION!!

I got so drunk last night
.
.
.
.
. .
I walked across the dance floor to
get another drink nd I won the
DANCE COMPETATION!! :P :D

Ghar Main Maa behan Nahi Hain kiyaa?

Per Girl ko Tang kar Raha Tha..
GiRl:
Tumhare Ghar Main
Maa behan Nahi Hain kiyaa?
Boy: No..
GiRl:
Toh Ghar
Le k Chalo Na Pagal
yahaan TiMe Q kharab kar Rahay ho?
Choty yeh 2013 ki LaRkiyaN HaiN..
1965 ki Nahi...

Humari To Ek Me Jaan Nikal Jati Hai

MATHS Ki Teacher:" 1 Me 2 Daalo To Kya Hoga ??
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Ladki:" Madam Ye To AAP Ki Capacity Hai Humari To Ek Me Jaan Nikal Jati Hai...:p :O :D :D

true Love without any dikhawa..

Ise kehte hai sacha pyar :D

Girlfrnd:"aur mera kutta kaisa hai.. ??
.
.
Bf:"main theek, Bhootni tu bata.. ??
.
Gf:"main b theek or gadhe kya ho rha hai.. ??
.
Bf:"kuch nhi bandariya tu bata..??
.
Gf:"mein to tujhse baat kar rahi hu
manhoos... :p
.
.
Bf:"achcha chudail..
.
Gf:"chal dafa ho ullu k pathe...
.
Bf:"tu bhi phut le bad dimag kutiya..
.
This called true Love without any
dikhawa...:p :O :D

Nahi Mera Boyfrnd Hain Mere Sath.

Great Insult…!!
.
.
Platform Par Saaman Ke Dher Ke Sath
Ek Ladki Baithi Hui Thi
. .
Kuli Ne Puchha- Madam..Coolie
Chahiye…….. ??
.
.
. .
.
Ladki – Nahi Mera
Boyfrnd Hain Mere
Sath.!. :D

125 crore indians forever happy.

Once Soniya,
Manmohan Singh & Chidambaram were travelling in a helicopter, 

Soniya drops a 100 Rs Note& says, "I made one poor Indian happy" 

Singh drops two 50 Rs notes& says "I made two
poor indians happy"

finally chiddu drops
100 coins of one rupee & says"I made 100 poor
indians happy", .
.
Hearing this the pilot
laughs & says

"I will drop down all 3 of you and
make 125 crore indians forever happy... :p :O :D

oh my God! oh my God! oh my God!

Gadha Sherni se: Darling I Love U

Sherni: Chal be apni shakal dekhi hai?

Gadha: shakal ko maar Goli,
Niche dekh niche.

Sherni : oh my God!

I love u too.

How to torture a woman?

How to torture a woman?

Give her an ARMANI dress, 
DIAMOND jewelry,
MAC cosmetics,
LOUIS VUITTON bag,
GUCCi shoes,
And lock her in a room,
without mirror...
TADAP-TADAP KE MARR JAAYEGi..'.........

Chess is the only game in the world,
which reflects the status of the husband.
the poor king can take only one step at a time ...
While the mighty queen can do whatever she likes.
-------------

A woman is driving 1st time on the highway.
Her husband calls & says: "Be careful love,
It's just been on the radio,
that some one is driving opposite to the traffic on the highway.."

She replies: "Someone..? These rascals are in hundreds.!!!
---------

Why do most indian women request 4 the same husband,
in the next life.?..
Arre..itni mehnat se trained kiya hai..
waste thodi jane denge.!
-----------

STOCK MARKET EFFECT:
Depressed Husband to his fat wife:
"You are my only investment,
that has doubled.''

Childhood thinkings

classroom me 29% Students
ye
sochte he ke
"Agar ye fan Girega to Kispe
Girega " :p
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
And Baaki 71% Students ye
sochte he ke "Agar Yaha
Terrorist Attack ho to me
pure class ko kese
bacha lu." :p :D

Watch This